Why is self-esteem so important?
Because if you think poorly of yourself, you will tend to act
poorly. Low self-esteem is like a self-fulfilling prophecy. If you
believe that you are not capable or worthy, you are likely to
confirm this belief. Contrarily, someone who feels good about
themselves is more likely to make a difference in someone
else's lives.
Where does a bad self-image come from?
Not surprisingly, it is a widely held idea that a bad self-image
stems from unmet needs as a child. Someone who did not
receive enough love as a child is apt to be depressed, overly
fearful, etc., and spend their whole lives trying to avoid being
hurt again.
How should we feel about ourselves?
We should have a healthy self-image that reflects our
dependence on God while relying on each others' mutual
strength.
The scriptures do more than emphasize that it is important to
love ourselves. They also claim that our well-being and
happiness are tied to our need to feel guility or negatively about
bad behavior. We will be happy only when we learn to see the
importance of loving, hating, and dying to ourselves.
Loving Ourselves
We cannot claim not to love ourselves and at the same time be
dissatisfied with our appearance or our inability to meet our
expectations as well as the expectations of others. For
example, if we didn't love ourselves, we wouldn't care what we
looked like.
Hating Ourselves
God does not want us to look at ourselves with contempt (as in,
I am not pretty enough, etc.); He wants us to despise our self-
centeredness. We don't have a reason to feel good about
ourselves if we are living our life dependent on ourselves alone,
without God.
Dying to Ourselves
For us to be happy, we need to rely exclusively on God – we are
designed to feel empty if we don't. He should be our only
source for strength.
- “Just as a seed must die to produce a plant, so we need to
bury our confidence in all other hopes before we can
discover the ultimate blessedness of finding our life and
dignity and self-acceptance through a complete reliance on
God.”
By What Values Do We See Ourselves?
God does not want us to measure ourselves by values such as
beauty, intelligence, or by how much money we have. If we
value ourselves on these types of things, we are in trouble. He
wants us to value ourselves based on our inner strength in
adversity and our reliance on Him.
Are We Inherently Good or Bad?
We are shaped from the “polar opposites of spiritual dignity and
moral depravity.” We are born “broken” and spiritually
defective, and if we continue on this path we are apt to live our
lives in selfish pursuit of our own happiness at the expense of
others. On the other hand, we are also born with a certain
degree of spiritual dignity – meaning, we are created in the
likeness of God. If we work to cultivate this spiritual dignity –
rather than being wrapped up in stubborn self-reliance - we
can increase our self-worth. When we trust God and rely on
him, we are given a new life and a new sense of purpose that
resides outside the scope of our limited circumstances. We can
achieve anything that God wants us to achieve. God's will is the
limit. “All things work together for good for those who love
God.”
Where Can You Begin?
We can take our defects of character and use them to develop
our reliance on God. To turn to Him for strength to persevere
through life's challenges. God alone can provide us with
personal power and our purpose in life.
Reference:
RBC Ministries pamphlet “Self-Esteem: What Does the Bible
Say?” (2001)
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