------------------------------------------------------------------------------ A new poem:
Grinder
My mind's at it again, won't let me sleep. It's on that train. The locomotive to the land of the agony dwellers.
There is a sawing on the roof in the back of my mind, my head is grinding like sand under the weight of a hammer and the lever to the machine doesn't have an “off” position. All it takes is one word, one phrase, one beat of the drum to send me spinning into nowhere. At least nowhere pleasant.
So, how do you do this, make me shrivel like a slug under the flurry of salt? How do you take the last rise from me? How do you make me fall under the weight of my own consciousness? Because I let you. I let you seep into me like poison. Your vapors, the elixir for the self-righteous. Always the devouring. Never just a bite.
Time does not bring me respite, I can only hope for the forgetting, and words of assurance in the multitude to soothe my teeming brain.
If only I could harness these words, these thoughts, these schemes, I could erect monuments to honor the inventors of time. I could transcend the metaphysical, develop mental concrete. But then what would I do? I might be happy, I might not wait for the other shoe to...come crashing through the ceiling.
For now, it is quiet. For now, the forgetting has arrived. For now, I will savor the look, the life. Until next time...
2010
-------------------------------------------------------------------- "Haunted House" (Actually, this is in North Myrtle Beach. It sticks out like a sore thumb amidst the array of mini-golf courses, beachwear stores, and food joints. Apparently it used to be a pasta and pizza restaurant.)
Well, we are finally settled. The move went well, despite having to get new movers on both ends at the last minute. I got about 100 emails! It worked out for the best. We love the new place. I especially love the jacuzzi tub. It is definitely about 5 steps up from the last place. The cost of living is lower here than in Asheville. The heat is crazy! I am going to start running again soon and I am going to have to go at 5:00 a.m. Not sure when I will paint - I guess right after that. It has been a year since I painted so it will take a while to get back into the groove. It is going to take a while to get the garage set up.
I have some waterfall, hiking, and old building pics to post which I will do soon. There is a really cool black and white building that sticks out like a sore thumb here that I am going to get a picture of.
We had to say goodbye to Land of the Sky (our church) last weekend. It was sad. They asked us to give testimony (where you talk about your experience with how God has/is worked/working in your life and your experience with the church). I went first and Delores second. We shared from the heart. They are hoping that it will help others who are apprehensive to do the same thing. I think I will miss the church even more than the hiking, believe it or not. A close call.
We went to the beach during the day just to take a look. I was out literally less than 5 minutes and I got sunburned a little on my face. I think that is pathetic. I am light-skinned, but come on! It is way too hot to lay out. Maybe at the pool, but not at the beach. We will do the sunrise/sunset thing.
That's all for now, more later. I will be posting my art newsletter on the 8th.
Much more in the way of updates, etc. to come later this week, but just wanted to check in to say we are excited about our move tomorrow! We had to go to Plan B (well, really B and C) but I took care of things and I think we will be alright.
I've posted some of the stuff from the ceremony. More pictures are to come; one of my friends is having technical difficulties with her computer/camera.
My favorite worship song. I first heard it at Land of the Sky, a rendition done in a "hippie" style by the guitarist and vocalist who later played at our ceremony.
One week and one day away from the big move! We are so excited. And sad at the same time. We are going on a hike with Floyd today to Looking Glass Falls and Sliding Rock. I haven't been to either. You know I will be posting pictures!
I have packed my office and D is almost done packing hers. I have worked out a schedule which includes packing but some fun too. But we MUST adhere to the schedule to get it all done. We can't afford a meltdown like last time because we aren't moving close by. It all has to fit. I may have to rent a second truck, we have so much stuff. And the truck we have is supposed to accommodate a 5 bedroom house! We have mostly art stuff and we both love to read and re-read so we have a lot of books.
While we are really looking forward to the move, we are really sad about leaving our church. Yes, there's email and even the phone, but it's not the same. Our pastors have a special place in our hearts and minds, and I KNOW we will not find another church that will come anywhere close to the home we found at Land of the Sky. Then there's the mountains. I love to hike and I will be very sad to leave. Granted, it will be nice to be on flat ground where I can start running again and go to the pool and the beach. Well, I have always wanted to experience beach life and now I get to. I have lived near the mountains all my life (except in my early years in Alabama) and it's time to move forward to the next chapter of our lives. Especially after the ceremony. We still can't believe we did it. Though it's not legally binding, it may as well be. A commitment before a loving and accepting God is serious to us.
Oh - interesting story. The J.W.'s point blank asked me if I believed in a paradise Earth. I told them that I don't know either way. How could I? I can't rely on logic for such matters. I don't believe in Heaven, and I believe our soul dies with us (differentiated from our spirit, which I believe is pure energy and may take on a different form), but that I wasn't sure. I dismiss nothing outright. They keep saying how they talk about me to each other and what a great understanding I have of the Bible, and how inquisitive I am. They would love nothing more than for me to convert. It's not happening. I am going to see them two more times. Believe it or not, I will miss them as well. They are wonderful people, especially Ken, he is so kind-hearted and less condescending in his answers to my questions, but Carol is very nice as well. I love his voice and the way he enunciates. I didn't think I would become attached to anyone here. When we left VA, I didn't even say goodbye to my good friends. I needed to get out of there quickly and I just did, despite my long-term roots. Long story. Asheville is a neat town and I will miss the liberal attitude here. I have always felt accepted. In S.C. we will have to be very careful.
Enough for now. I will keep you posted on the move!
I've posted my latest edition of the CJH Abstract Art newsletter. I will be posting pics, etc. of the ceremony soon, I just need to get the digital tape transferred to DVD.
Yesterday was awesome. I couldn't have asked for a better ceremony. I will be posting pics, video, and our "program" and the sermon that our pastor gave. It was beautiful. The only things that went wrong were that I had planned a trolley tour for my out of town guests and the damn trolley was early (so were we). So, my meticulous planning didn't work out. I had to get a refund. I had the schedule all figured out. We ended up just going straight to dinner and then going on a ghost tour. I had raw oysters at dinner and they didn't sit well with me. I was nauseous all night after that, with some brief respite when I was having too much fun to focus on it. All that stuff was no big deal. We all had a great time and that is what is important.
Tomorrow's the big day! Eeek! :) Today my good friend Amy is coming in from Charlotte and we are all going to get manis and pedis, run some errands, and probably see a movie at our favorite theater (it's like being in someone's home - leather couches with tables to put your feet up on - very cool). Tomorrow a.m. D gets her hair done, then we have a couple of hours until the ceremony. Yesterday we got our eyebrows done and the day before haircuts. D got some color. In the light it has cool velvet highlights along with some warm colors. We never realized how dark her hair is.
Tomorrow after the ceremony, a small group of us will be going on a trolley tour (a cheesey and easy way to show them the town), out to dinner to get lobster (my favorite food) and then go on a ghost tour. A long day but should be fun. This morning we have to get this place in shape for Amy. We have mentally vacated and physically neglected this place since we decided to go to MB, half-packed and such, so it is a little crowded and messy. Thanks to crappy landlords, they still haven't leveled or seeded the front lawn that they dug up, nor have they removed the tree ruined by the snowstorm. What a dump! Thank God we are getting out of here.
After the ceremony, then comes the packing. I have spaced things out over 2.5 weeks so it isn't stressful. I had a meltdown last time because I didn't do a lot of packing and we were trying to do it when the movers (our handy guys) were moving stuff. It was from the mountains to in town so we had the luxury of a couple of trips. This time it's all got to be ready and fit. I got the largest truck available. The current couch will be put in my studio for when I want to chill or look over art books for inspiration. I have already envisioned how I want to place things. I am really excited. I already got some awesome running shoes and can't wait to get back to that again.
Gushing and hoping you have a great weekend. I will keep you updated.
We found a perfect place in Longs, SC, that is 15 minutes from the beach (we didn't want to live too near the beach due to "party-ers" and older homes), away from traffic, and 20 minutes from D's parents' house. The community has a pool and a golf course. There are older people across the street, so it seems safe and it is quiet. We ordered new furniture and are thrilled. I will have a two-car garage again and plenty of room to paint. Watching the sun rise over the beach...it still hasn't sunk in yet. Instead of living in older houses, this one is 9 years old and is owned by a couple who used to live there. They wanted a larger house. Only one tenant since then, a cop's family, and the place is clean. It has a Carolina room, which will be great to read in. It is complete with a large jacuzzi tub and the largest walk-in closet I have ever seen. Not to mention storage in the attic. I plan for my office to be sparse. The only down side is that there is thin wallpaper at the top of each room. Since my office color scheme is black and white, I will get white trim to tack up over the wallpaper. Now all that's left is to buy a new t.v. Anyway, nothing special to a lot of you out there, but great for us.
The ceremony is one week and one day away and we are really excited and looking forward to wearing the custom- designed rings. They are very unique. I will have to post a picture of it.
I added a new poem. (At the end of the page, as usual.)
I hope you all have a great weekend. Tomorrow we start packing the garage. That will be the most daunting task as we, or should I say I, have a LOT of art stuff. And I haven't even ordered my new paints yet. 60 colors! I hope it doesn't take too long to get back into the swing of things.
I went on a hike to Catawba Falls with my friend Floyd yesterday. Of all of the hikes I have been on, this one was the easiest with the greatest corresponding payoff. You can see a video here (Part I) and here (Part II) (I had to split it up to fit within You Tube's length specifications). You can see pics here.
Guess who came to my door yesterday? None other than my J. W. friends whom I was studying the Bible with. I had made it clear that there were certain things I didn't agree with and wouldn't change my mind about, but they didn't seem to care. They missed me. Honestly, I missed them too. I enjoyed studying the Bible with them, because I rarely read it on my own. So, I am going back to their house next Tuesday. It's not going to change the fact that I am a Christian, and I will continue going to my church and Sunday school every week as I have been doing.
I have my mind set on skydiving again, which WILL happen, most likely this summer. D is concerned. I called the facility in TN where I want to do the jump, and asked if they have had any fatalities. They said they had not at their facility, but gave me a web site to check out where participating facilities report fatalities. Of 2.5 million jumps in 2009, there were 16 fatalities. They didn't list the reason for the fatalities, but I'd be willing to bet that they weren't tandem jumps. He encouraged me to visit the facility to get acquainted with the jump zone and address any concerns I may have. Nah, I just want to go for it. I will be scared, but I am sure I will be exhilarated at the same time.
I went on another 5-hour hike in the Blue Ridge mountains with my usual weekday daytime hiking friends. Apparently, according to some people we met on the trail, the Obamas hiked the trail we were on - for 30 minutes. Wimps! Must have been for show. And the trail they picked didn't lead to waterfalls or a summit. They could have made a better choice. Well, perhaps this one isn't as well traveled and that's why they chose it. The pics from the hike are here.
I have to share the work of a friend on deviantART. His art is so colorful, so happy, so wonderful. He goes by "remnance of plen". Click here to go to his deviantART account. I really encourage you to check it out.
What you should know, but don't want to know...D's blog. She is a genius when it comes to this stuff. It's scary to think about.
So, I have insomnia but I should be o.k. for our hikes today. The Obamas are here in Asheville dominating the scene. I think I picked some things far enough out of town that we won't be thwarted by them. I will post pics.
We found our song for the ceremony, "All That Is" by Garnet Rogers. Actually, our musician (Moss) came up with it and played it for us and we loved it. It was apparently a big hit in Canada but never quite caught on here. We actually like the way Moss does it better. Here are the lyrics:
Who can tell when in love you'll finally fall? Some live in vain and never love at all But as lightning strikes or as a small insistent voice Of we are blessed we will hear and heed the call
Give your love and never count the cost Lose your heart and never call it lost May your love be your shelter to the ending of your days Love is all that is, all that ever was
May your love grow strong and always kind May your hearts grow forever more entwined In the brightest day or the stillness of the night May it be each others hand you seek and find
Never more to be alone Ever closer you have grown Forever now may no distance come between And in each other's loving hearts you find a home
We plan to desensitize ourselves to it so we don't cry at the ceremony!